“Hi, how are you?”

“I miss you so bad”

“I miss you too”


“I want this song to be played on my wedding day”

“So do I”


“How did you know that I am here?”

“I just knew. Because it was you”


“You need to introduce me with your girlfriend, you two have been together like forever”



“I have a boyfriend now”

“Aw, good for you”

“I never see you on the bad mood or grumpy”

“You will never see it. You make the best of me”


“You, stay here”

“I will never leave”


“I am sorry, I leave you when you need me the most”



Life of Insomniac in A Loop

21.00 hrs

“I should go to bed”

The body lay in bed, head start to singing some random song

22.00 hrs

“Still, I can not sleep. I forget my medicine”

Walking around the room to find some pills. Something that was hidden before.

00.00 hrs

Wide awake, after dreaming falling down from cliff.

“Are you okay?”

01.00 hrs

Do some squats.

Sweats and tiredness will take you to deep sleep

02.00 hrs

“Shit! Really?”

Do some sit up. Drink glass of milk. Tidy up the room.

“Oh god, milk. No. Sugar rush is such a lie”

03.00 hrs

Rain outside

“What else? Raining? I need to work. If it is not stop, I will be doomed”

Hear sound of the heavy rain like forever

04.00 hrs

“I totally give up to sleep”.

Prepare to go to work. Exhausted. Really

05.00 hrs

Ready to conquer the world

A letter that I need to reply

Dear you, my dearest friend.

I hope that you are okay. No.  I hope that you are in your best condition now. 

Thank you for being such a good company, nice friend, a someone that I hanged around, someone I ran into when I sad and I just realise that you take care of me that much. Abundantly. 

I am sorry. It means nothing now.

 I am not a good friend. I was’t there when you need someone. I wasn’t there, when you were in your worst. I keep myself at the center, left you rotated around me. I forgot, that you suffered that much. I only care about myself.

I wish that you always have a joy, blessings and being loved in every way you live. I know you can overcome all the obstacle, because you are the strong and most optimistic person I’ve known. 

I am not sure what I really want right now. I think it should be leave as it is now. It is for the best. But still, deep down, I want the old us. I want to give in return what I got before from you. Happiness. I want us. 


Saya pernah sombong

Merasa bahagia adalah tentang menyenangkan diri sendiri.

Bahagia adalah melakukan apa yang kamu suka.

Saya salah.

Bahagia saya adalah mereka. Rumah.

Mereka yang sering saya lupakan perasaannya.

Mereka yang paling tersakiti karena ego saya yang tinggi.

Bahagia saya adalah mereka. Rumah

The shadow I just know by a small glance.

You own it. It was you.

Stood behind the door. I tought you were looking at me. You didn’t.

It was just me. I sat still, even though I wanted it so much. To see you. It was not an urge, I said to myself. Repeated like broken tape.

Still, I looked for you. I was looking for you. You weren’t there. I know, I want you so bad.

Let’s have a deep conversation

They said it as pillow talk

When the truth can be seen in darkness

A small light of happiness dimmed on us

How are you doing?

It is late in the night, I know you will be tired of saying I’m fine’

How is it going?

Let this solitude bring us to a infinite intimacy.

Just you and me

Let’s have a deep conversation

Until dawn time, we back to each other’s place